We are taught since youth to do the right things, develop the right habits, and build a good life. As words are only as good as their interpretation, perhaps stating the formula for a successful life in this way does more harm than good, for maybe we are not building at all…
Maybe life is more like sculpting; not an additive process at all, but a subtractive one, where unessential layers are peeled back, or chipped away- revealing what was hiding inside all along.
Perhaps this seems like too passive an approach to life…as if we didn’t struggle, we would succumb to laziness and passivity.
I think you would have to look long and hard to find a lazy sculptor. Rather, they watch…they look…they feel for the right stroke that will reveal the masterpiece that lies in every block of wood, every slab of marble.
Maybe observing our lives is the most productive thing we can do.
Many of us struggle, trying to find our path, feeling that if we don’t try hard enough, we might miss it. Stemming from my own insecurity, I often forget that I can’t fail at being me. For nine gestational months everything fell into place without my hand, without my guidance. Why would I think that the next chapter would be any different, and the more control I grasp for, the less control I have? Let go, lighten up.
He called me often, needed a hand. He said “please…sometime, call ME for help!” I said I was always more than willing to help. With tireless devotion, he tended to his wife…stricken with MS…and I don’t know which of them suffered more. But never once did he complain, though his face showed the strain. “I can’t help it” he said “I love her so much!” and I was reminded again that LOVE is a verb…
So often we struggle to be seen as “right”.
Seeking validation is a sign of weakness, and right and wrong are often nebulous at best. A true Warrior is not concerned with joining groups or how he is seen; he travels his path, facing his personal darkness, and pushes forward for the light on the other side, knowing our darkness is the path to our growth, and is our personal journey, to be traveled alone.
The dance of opposites is what makes everything possible.
Dark doesn’t exist without light,
just as computer code needs both zeros and ones.
We come to grasp, hopefully, that how we choose to use
the experiences of our past, shape who we are
but do we ever consider that the future is also calling us
to who we are to become?
Who we are right now…depends on both.
We spend so much time, and waste so much energy analyzing, criticizing, and categorizing each other. When we are forced to be alone, we are left with the true source of our conflict and confusion…ourselves. Take the time to do what you love to do, because it’s how you handle your isolation that determines your fate.
If left unchecked, it can spread like fire…leaving us immobilized. But we are not powerless; we only need to see that the root of all dis-ease is fear. Fear only has power when we don’t face it, or can’t see it. Taking the action to face it always changes the outcome… just like Schrödinger’s cat. Advancing in the presence of fear…that’s how warriors are made.
Most of us think that if that person hadn’t said that, then I would feel better. If only those people didn’t act that way, then life would be better. Aversion to conflict is a sickness itself; not that we wish it on anyone, but how we handle it determines if we give our power away…or keep it, and grow.
There will be some that say this is wrong of me to suggest, but I am not taking you’re power…you’re giving it away.
Words can cripple, and words can heal.
Wielded in the right hands, they can give the gift of hope, a light in the darkness where none seem to be found.
But only for others; Words are ineffective, or clumsy at best when used to describe or explain oneself.
They will often be taken as grandiose, self-deprecating, or worse…
not heard at all.
In matters of the self, don’t worry about what others think…because its none of your business anyway…not is it under your control.
Let your actions tell the tale of who you are. That will always be enough.
We attach meaning to an event in order to explain it, to justify our actions, to expose the Truth about something. But meaning is just an interpretation of an experience that, at best, can be used as a pointer to the event, in the hope that another can derive the same experience.
MEANING isn’t real. It certainly isn’t static, and it does the opposite of our best intentions; it tells more about us than it does about what it is intended to reveal.